Commitment 10:

Opposite of My Story

Exploring the opposite means being open to the notion that opposite of your story (thoughts, beliefs, opinions) could be as true or truer than your story. 

It is not the issue itself that causes pain, but your interpretation of it. 

Conscious leaders take responsibility for being the labeler of their experiences and their life, and they learn to question all their labels.

From Above the Line

By Me:

I commit to believing my stories and the meaning I give them as the truth.

From below the Line

To Me:

I commit to being right and to seeing this situation as something that is happening to me. I commit to being defensive especially when I am certain that I am RIGHT.

Practice It:

Use “The Work” by Byron Katie to practice looking at the opposite of your stories. Pick an issue like “Paul should understand me.”

Pick an Issue Like: “Paul should understand me.”

1. Is it true?

Is it true that he should understand you? Be still. Wait for the heart’s response.

2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true?

Ultimately, can you really know what he should or shouldn’t understand? Can you absolutely know what is in his best interest to understand?

3. How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?

What happens when you believe “Paul should understand me” and he doesn’t? Do you experience anger, stress, frustration? How do you treat Paul? Do you give him “the look”? Do you try to change him in any way? How do these reactions feel? How do you treat yourself? Does that thought bring stress or peace into your life? Be still as you listen.

4. Who would you be without the thought?

Close your eyes. Picture yourself in the presence of Paul. Now imagine looking at Paul, just for a moment, without the thought “I want him to understand.” What do you see? What would your life look like without that thought?

The Turnaround

Close your eyes. Picture yourself in the presence of Paul. Now imagine looking at Paul, just for a moment, without the thought “I want him to understand.” What do you see? What would your life look like without that thought?

For example, “Paul should understand me” turns around to:

  • I should understand me.
  • I should understand Paul.
  • Paul shouldn’t understand me.

© 2015 Byron Katie International, Inc. All rights reserved. thework.com” at the bottom as a credit

Next Commitment

Additional Resources

Facts vs. Story

Learn More

Commitment #10 Meditation – The Opposite of My Story

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The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership

01.

Responsibility

Commit to taking full responsibility for the circumstances of my life, and my physical, emotional, mental and spiritual wellbeing. I commit to support others to take full responsibility for their lives. 

Learn More

02.

Curiosity

Commit to growing in self-awareness. I commit to regarding every interaction as an opportunity to learn. I commit to curiosity as a path to rapid learning.

Learn More

03.

Feelings

Commit to feeling my feelings all the way through to completion. They come, and I locate them in my body then move, breathe and vocalize them so they release all the way through.

Learn More

04.

Candor

I commit to saying what is true for me. I commit to being a person to whom others can express themselves with candor.

Learn More

05.

Gossip

Commit to ending gossip, talking directly to people with whom I have an issue or concern, and encouraging others to talk directly to people with whom they have an issue or concern.

Learn More

06.

Integrity

Commit to the masterful practice of integrity, including acknowledging all authentic feelings, expressing the unarguable truth and keeping my agreements.

Learn More

07.

Appreciation

Commit to living in appreciation, fully opening to both receiving and giving appreciation.

Learn More

08.

Genius

Commit to expressing my full magnificence, and to supporting and inspiring others to fully express their creativity and live in their zone of genius.

Learn More

09.

Play & Rest

Commit to creating a life of play, improvisation, and laughter. I commit to seeing all of life unfold easefully and effortlessly. I commit to maximizing my energy by honoring rest, renewal and rhythm.

Learn More

10.

Opposite of My Story

Commit to seeing that the opposite of my story is as true or truer than my original story. I recognize that I interpret the world around me and give my stories meaning.

Learn More

11.

Approval

Commit to being the source of my security, control and approval.

Learn More

12.

Enough

Commit to experiencing that I have enough of everything… including time, money, love, energy, space, resources, etc.

Learn More

13.

Allies

Commit to seeing all people and circumstances as allies that are perfectly suited to help me learn the most important things for my growth.

Learn More

14.

Win for All

Commit to creating win for all solutions (win for me, win for the other person, win for the organization, and win for the whole) for whatever issues, problems, concerns, or opportunities life gives me.

Learn More

15.

Being the Resolution

Commit to being the resolution or solution that is needed: seeing what is missing in the world as an invitation to become that which is required.

Learn More

The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership

01.

Responsibility

I commit to taking full responsibility for the circumstances of my life, and my physical, emotional, mental and spiritual wellbeing. I commit to support others to take full responsibility for their lives. 

Learn More

02.

Curiosity

I commit to growing in self-awareness. I commit to regarding every interaction as an opportunity to learn. I commit to curiosity as a path to rapid learning.

Learn More

03.

Feelings

I commit to feeling my feelings all the way through to completion. They come, and I locate them in my body then move, breathe and vocalize them so they release all the way through.

Learn More

04.

Candor

I commit to saying what is true for me. I commit to being a person to whom others can express themselves with candor.

Learn More

05.

Gossip

I commit to ending gossip, talking directly to people with whom I have an issue or concern, and encouraging others to talk directly to people with whom they have an issue or concern.

Learn More

06.

Integrity

I commit to the masterful practice of integrity, including acknowledging all authentic feelings, expressing the unarguable truth and keeping my agreements.

Learn More

07.

Appreciation

I commit to living in appreciation, fully opening to both receiving and giving appreciation.

Learn More

08.

Genius

I commit to expressing my full magnificence, and to supporting and inspiring others to fully express their creativity and live in their zone of genius.

Learn More

09.

Play & Rest

I commit to creating a life of play, improvisation, and laughter. I commit to seeing all of life unfold easefully and effortlessly. I commit to maximizing my energy by honoring rest, renewal and rhythm.

Learn More

10.

Opposite of My Story

I commit to seeing that the opposite of my story is as true or truer than my original story. I recognize that I interpret the world around me and give my stories meaning.

Learn More

11.

Approval

I commit to being the source of my security, control and approval.

Learn More

12.

Enough

I commit to experiencing that I have enough of everything… including time, money, love, energy, space, resources, etc.

Learn More

13.

Allies

I commit to seeing all people and circumstances as allies that are perfectly suited to help me learn the most important things for my growth.

Learn More

14.

Win for All

I commit to creating win for all solutions (win for me, win for the other person, win for the organization, and win for the whole) for whatever issues, problems, concerns, or opportunities life gives me.

Learn More

15.

Being the Resolution

I commit to being the resolution or solution that is needed: seeing what is missing in the world as an invitation to become that which is required.

Learn More

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